New lifestyle
it's 318am now. I woke up because dad was shouting and seems to need something or someone to be around. stood besides him for some time. I tried to guess what he need. My helper applied oilment on his stomach and hope it will make him more comfortable.
This is almost a daily routine for me and my mom since dad was discharged from hospital. To wake up 2-3 times in the night to respond to dad's shouting and frustration.
Everytime when this happens, i would stand besides him "sleepily" and see if he needs anything or not. It sounds like parents with new born baby where they need to wake up as and when the baby cries.
The interuptions in the night was not easily adjusted for me. At times, i dislike the interuptions. I wished I could sleep peaccefully throughout the night. I wished I know what my dad needs but sometimes can't tell. Sometimes he just need someone to be just besides him.
it was a new lifestyle for me and mom. it has been close to 4 months. It was not easy at all but God gave strength and hope to me as I prayed.
The strength to live with interuptions at night. The hope that my dad will know Jesus is with him. The hope that he will get better and better.
That's what ultimately I have. The Hope in Christ and strength in Christ. Thats what I carry into my daily lives to face things that is beyond myself. Life is not a bed of roses and sometimes it may not be easy But....
Jesus said, " Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matt 11:29-30.That's just so wonderful! Jesus will carry it and I just be relax in his presence and power! what a good deal!
Friends, meditate on the Words of Jesus. Take the deal when you face situation that you can't handle and you are stress over it. It can be anything in your life. Jesus offers this deal to you and so that you can run and not grow tired, walk and not be faint but rather you can soar under his wings.
What a deal, so take it as regularly as you can.
S1AN!!!
Adults ESS just another 2 more days! I'm so excited to meet new friends in NG8! All CLs gathered last Sunday to pray that we will see 2 new friends joining us and may they be touch by the love and gospel of God and to cross the line!
Only God can do so!
deeper source
The story is told of a farmer who owned an orchard in a valley full of orchards. One year the drought was harsher than all the previous years. Yet his trees were verdant and more fruitful than the surrounding ones. The other farmers' trees were brown while his were still green. They gathered one day to ask his secret.
He replied, "My trees can go another 4 weeks without water. You see, when they were young, I often withheld water from them so that their roots were forced to drill deeper to find water. So while other trees are dying, mine are drinking from a much deeper source."
Drill down, and get your water from a deeper source.
This story illustrate how my spiritual growth should be. Those circumstances that are tough, harsh and seemingly hopeless are enviornment that 'forced' me to go to deeper source - God. Not so positive and promising situations are moments for me to grow my roots deeper so I can receive from God.
These are important moments! It's for me to spread my roots deeper to get wisdom, hope, love, courage, faith, purpose and many more from the everlasting source.
That's the way it should be. My spiritual roots to spread and grow deeper so that I can bear spiritual fruits in all seasons. So that I can reach higher and further.
chill out places to chill out
i enjoy the embience and music of certain pubs. I'm not into hard rock music but jazz and unplugged music does attracts me.
In the past 1 year, there are a few good pubs that i hang out with polydins peeps. A nice place to chat and chill out.
There are some peeps who don't like to drink but it's fine because it serves non alcholic drink too. So check these places for a time of chilling out after a heavy meal!
A)
JAZZ@southbridge located along Boat Quay. if you game for jazz music and quieter embience, this will be for you. This is one of my favourite if not my favourite. Many in their 30 something gather here
B) Timbre - The art house. It located along Singapore River. if you support local band and like the open air concept, then this place will be for you. many polydins leaders loves this place. We celebrated many birthday here and got one of our "vocalist" up to sing once before! hohho!
C) the recent place that we chill out is at Pan Pacific Hotel bar. It's such a nice embience and the cakes are superb! The service was good and the singer sang a beautiful birthday song to Abigail. I will visit the place again. I like the chips and smoothing music. It's not loud, i love it!
NEW day!
I like this quotes. I can't remember the author but it has put it wisely and simply about living daily in freshness with God's grace, mercy and power.
"I have to let yesterday be done with, the joys as well as sorrows, the trophies and tragedies and leave them in God's hands. They are no longer mine to possess. Thus, I cannot cruise through today on yesterdays awards and old press clippings, and neither can i allow past sorrows to dictate a yet unchartered future!"
New beginnings allows me to tap into fresh potential.
So dreams, visualise and live out all what God has in store for me! that's just so exciting and awesome!
a recommended book about Angels
I chanced upon this book 2 weeks ago, Angels, God's secret Agent, by Billy Graham.
It's a good book because it covers a comprehensive understanding of Angels. It's very bible based and and it make it easy to understand. Most of all, it do not just touches on theory of angels, it also addressed what does Angels' role of today. You can find it in the last chapter.
I like the introduction because Billy Grahman emphasised not his experiences on angels but rather the biblical understanding about Angels and the experiences we can find in the bible. It's balance as he draws the bible experiences and experiences by different people.
So if you are keen to know and understand more about Angels, can check out this book.
a special trip
I took 3 days leave and went on a personal retreat on Tues till thurs. I took a coach and travel to KL. I wanted somewhere not in s'pore yet not somewhere new. (my direction sense sucks so go to somewhere i have been before is better...)
I book a nice hotel near town area. So I can slack and have my personal time in reading and reflecting in my cosy room and at times I can walk to the mall and get some massage.
I brought my bible, notepad and a book.
what happen that requires this 3 days retreat.
2nd quarter was a trying quarter for me. I never know to care for a sick parent needs alot of physical and emotional energy. it really needed so much. My off day once a week usually is not really rest for me now. I share room with my mom so my dad could have a own room. Thus there is no more personal space. This is a major change for me especially in 2nd quarter as I have to travel to and forth to hospital, or something happen to my dad at home, need to call home nurse at night and try to discerned what's wrong with him. It does drains me emotionally. alot actually. I didn't know until I reflected alot more in this trip.
Due to that, my speaking trip to Hope Sabah camp then roles and responsibilities in LC and after that ESS. I was so fatigue. I knew I needed rest - to take a step back to re-evaluate my life and re-adjust my life.
God is good in the 3 days trip. I had a chance to reflect what drains me and what fills my emotional and mental tank. I read the book - Leading on empty and was a timely book for me. I was laughing on my hotel bed when I saw some simliar symptons of possible burnout. The author put the words to describe how I felt.
Any leaders may face burnout. I experienced early signs of that and I decided and determined to look into 2 areas of my life that I will not compromise.
a) Daily Devotional Time with God. My home may not be a good place for that any more so I need to adjust. Either I wake up much earlier before my dad wakes up or I leave my house earlier to somewhere quiet for me to reflect on the Word.
b) Healthy body. Start small but need to start now in exercising. I checked out some classes that i may sign up this coming week. I need people to do it with me and I must enjoy what I do too.
No one will take care of the 2 areas i mentioned above and the only one can do so is ME! So Jas, simple yet foundamental to build in my life to last well.
Spiritual and physical health is not built in a day but it is build daily. so Jas, makes this my ways of life.
I'm so glad that I went away and just be alone. Just so glad to spend time with my maker and just enjoy Him fully. That's just so cool!
Jesus, you really rocks... you're the reason of my existence, you're the reason of my passion, you're the reason of my service.
Rests humbles my soul. I re-enter as a servant.
That's how my 3 days rest brought me to.
